The idea of slowing

I have been serching for a change this last month, something that says I stand apart from where I am. something that will make me more content waiting for so long to be where i want to be in my life. I have felt much like the scean in my favorite movie"the Piano" when the piano gos down in the ocean and later she thinks of herself still tied to it....still in the depths,swaying with the water.She spent a lifetime in her own silence, till she met someone who she wanted to speak for, a man that made her want to live. much of my life i have been as cinderella, or anyother princess, waiting for someone to add color to my life, to bring out the beauty from within. and as I speak it is i in this small town ,which is silent twards me,that has finnaly let go of the rescuer idea. and have realized what i have known all along. that I am the color to be added to others. i have been reading Marlaina de blasi's books(1000 days in tuscany,1000 days in venice) and in her memwars she talks of things like i have always felt, she slows to become part of things,she actualy tastes her food, wraps herself up in the colors in life, and in doing so she changes people.And so I think of differnt women I have met like this. extrordinary women who change how you look at life. I want to be one of those.But then I must embrace the part of me that society these modern days rejects.The anchient part that has came through time wanting to wear flowing skirts and bake breads rich in aromatic rosemary.and here we embrace an idea......slowing down....an idea that alows us to flow with the waves, to play the piano, but to also keep our heads above water. what if we just enjoy the moment, then ejoy the next, then the next. what if we slow down and watch how the light creaps over things, iluminating this part then that part.what if we are like that light, and we learn to be patient and we illuminate the texture of a bright mango as it fills all our sences, what if we watch the trees move till thier branches pass the secret on to the next tree and so on.sometimes good things wash up on our beach and we keep and cherish these treasures, but shouldnt we also treasure the things that are ripped by thewave and washed away, knowing that theyare the treasure someone else recieves. just what if we concentrate on thatchance that if we let go of that speed and that selfish living, that maybe we can achieve being the light to others.whatwould it hurt to stay a few moments longer in line and actualy meet the person waiting with us.what might we see if we looked behond something wewant for our hord and chose instead something to give. what if we took a small amount and set it aside just to see what we could do.I phrase all these questions as statements, because thats how i want you to take them,the what if isnt a fantancy you cant reach, it is a fact that you can acomplish, but its got to be moment by moment, so you need the stops. what if i cound.(stop and alow it in,dont answer, just let it in, to begin, to become)slowly look at the possibilitys. as many of you know i live without a cell phone, i actualy have a phone attached to the wall, I am not old fashioned, i simply reply when people ask , that i do not always want to be found. when I go to the grocery store i want to smell the mellons and look for some new ingrediant to taste, I do not want to talk to you about what your kid did yesterday, it isnt that i dont want to know...it is instead this(let this blow your mind) that as the bible says there is a time for everything. and when its time for me to hear about your son, i will be attached to my wall, full attention on your voice. some people say it is for safty, the cell, well i read something on wasp spay for safty too, and i am sorry but i am not going to spend my precious number of days in fear carring a can of wasp spray. I am a mom, i do wory, my son gos out with a walky talkie, and so he can say " all is well" and I can say "get your butt home its dark" but as far as real safty I have My GOd and he is "bigger then the boogie man" as a tomato once said. and so I choose now, freedom, slowness,life,flavor,light patience, moments worth more then gold.....I sway with the currant and if I color anothers world then I smile and continue on my journey, my song of whales, slowly but surely I will cross seas . slowly i can already smell the sea